2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
