bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
