...so i touched it.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
You're like the curious george of whores
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
