I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
