wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I didn't notice because vodka
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Sorry about my life...
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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