his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Terrible idea I love it
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Randomize
