White coat. Heels.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Randomize
