I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Randomize
