i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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