how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
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