So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
