I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
