I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
