We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
So much rum. So many feels.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Randomize
