Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
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