I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
bring money and cleavage
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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