I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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