What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I wish i was in the wii world.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
