Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Can Purell be used as lube?
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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