I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
