I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize