Your tits are I can't wait for
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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