I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
