go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
this beer tastes like vomit already
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
