what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize