You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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