Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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