Sponge bath it is.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
