Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
