so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
