You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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