it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
