tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
