if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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