So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Do vagina's smell?
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
