I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Randomize
