Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I fill condoms, not promises.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Randomize
