how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
