Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
