I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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