My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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