just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
