a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
