Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
