How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
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