Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
