after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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