I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
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