these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Randomize
