For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
